


(No One Will) Love You As You Are.

by JackandMarkaremySunandStars (ImagineBeingSafe)



Series: In Sickness and In Health. [3]
Category: Markiplier-fandom, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Bad Parenting, Comfort, Depression, Dysfunctional Family, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff, Food Issues, Ftm!Reader - Freeform, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Illnesses, Love, M/M, Panic Attacks, Past Child Abuse, Suicide Threats, Trans Male Character, Vomiting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-28
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-05-29 20:17:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15080918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImagineBeingSafe/pseuds/JackandMarkaremySunandStars
Summary: Set in the same universe as this one shot.https://archiveofourown.org/works/14911091/chapters/34647710What happens when the Readers mother comes to LA?Will this be what breaks your relationship with Mark?Can you escape unscathed?





	1. We got a whole lot of money, but we still pay rent 'Cause you can't buy a house in heaven.

**Author's Note:**

> Set in the same universe as this one shot. 
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/14911091/chapters/34647710
> 
> This is the video Mark breaks you with: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gO0VQa5mgpU
> 
> these are the binders: https://www.shapeshifters.co/crop-top/space-binder

It was six months into your relationship before you agreed to properly appear in one of Mark's videos.

 

He discided to do a try not to laugh, but a couples version. He knew it'd be fun, and besides he loves your laugh. Apparently.

 

He totally cheated, too. He put a Husky compilation in, and you love them. Like he loves Chica, not that you don't love her, but you want a Husky someday.

 

He covered your eyes as he loaded the video.

 

"You did well. One last try to get you to laugh."

 

You were gone a minute in. Fucking cheater.

 

Pursing your lips to keep in a grin with a death glare aimed at him.

 

"Oh, god, that goober biting the cage…"

 

"That isn't a husky, that's a fucking teddy bear!"

 

"The last one reminded me of you."

 

"The one that knocked the camera down?" Mark clarified.

 

"Yeah. Grumpy you."

 

"I take offence to that. Or I should. Coming from you, it’s adorable."

 

A huff from you.

 

"Yeah. Since you clearly cheated, you're sleeping on the couch tonight."

 

"Wait, Y/N-"

 

The video ends with you storming off camera and him chasing after you.

 

You kissed him when he caught up.

 

"That was for the camera. I can't sleep alone anymore, anyways."

 

+

 

You had extra money, commissions for art and your job with Alex and Jace was busy.

 

So you splurged on several binders.  May as well love what they look like.

 

As it was getting into summer, you'd spend as long as you could in a day in just a binder and shorts.

 

You'd found very cool ones. But there was one in particular, you wanted to show off.

 

You texted Mark, telling him to go to your bedroom after he finished his stream.

 

He'd seen the multiple soft packages, but had no clue what was waiting for him.

 

He came into the bedroom,  to you standing by the bed in silky red boxers and a [space themed binder](https://static1.squarespace.com/static/5a5e1bb2010027ff5b7fae71/5a5e6b71e2c4834114a07893/5a986a0bec212d175328dc83/1529525728789/IMG_3908.JPG?format=2500w).

 

You spun in place, showing off.

 

Immediately he got hand-sy.

 

"This for me, babe?" he asked, his voice almost a purr, sliding his hands down your sides, stilling them at your waist.

 

You don't know why that makes your cheeks burn, or your voice disappear, but it does. 

 

So much for your "plan"  Mark has always affected you, but you thought you were a bit stronger-

 

-Nope, helpless.

 

Warm hands cup your face and lift it.

 

"I like it. You spoil me too much, Y/N, You're gorgeous."

 

You shove at him in play, not a little embarrassed by his praise, which prompts him to tackle you back onto the bed.

 

+

 

Laying in the afterglow, you can only think of one thing. You are so buying the rest of the space themed ones.

 

The next morning, you and Mark were sharing a space, getting ready.

 

He was in the shower. Distracting you. He got into moods where he'd do anything to get you to call in.

 

You knew his tricks, and would not be swayed by puppy eyes.

 

_Goddammit. He's singing now. My own personal Siren- using his voice against me is playing dirty._

 

You stop mid-brush of your teeth, distracted by thoughts of the last time you shared a shower, that perfect body of his wet, and warm against you.

 

You can't help the staring.

 

"Y/N,   Babe, I can feel you checking me out. You're welcome."

 

You almost choke on the mouthful of water you're rinsing with when you laugh.

 

 "Cocky Bastard. I fucking love you!"

 

Mark laughed.

 

"I motherfucking love you more!"

 

"Ok, I am working today. You can't make me stop.

 

Come get me, tonight, bring Chica, Alex misses her. And if we get too PDA, Jace might kick me out early. Or, Alex might get his Chica-fix and get Jace to take pity on us.

 

I'll see you, okay?"

 

"I already miss you!" Mark calls out as you leave for the day.


	2. The past shows itself.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A show-up and falling to pieces.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this has taken so long.   
> November was a wreck.  
> and the end of the year has kept me busy.
> 
> D/N stands for dead name.

**_Before._ **

 

+Mark's POV+

 

_I shut off my camera. I'm going to take Chica for a walk, maybe I can persuade Y/N to join me later for a twitch stream. Walking with Chica and I is a given. I'll get him to join me on a video sooner or later._

 

_I call out for him._

 

_No answer._

 

_I check his office, our bed room._

 

_Living room._

 

_Ah, there you are…_

 

_"Hey, I've been calling, Why-"_

 

_And I get a proper look and what I was going to say dies in my throat._

 

_Somethings wrong. Really wrong._

 

_Y/N's on his side, curled up loosely, like he'd just slid and stayed where he landed. His phone is on the floor, his eyes are red, and there are still wet trails from recent tears._

 

_For a moment, I think-_

 

_It's Alex or Jason. Something happened, something bad._

 

_And I except it. I know we'll make it._

 

_But right now, I need Y/N._

 

_I need him to come back to me, tell me what's happened, and I'll do my best to fix it, and if I can't, I'll be here for him._

 

_I move closer, and Y/N comes back with a jerk._

 

_As soon as he lays eyes on me, he's up, but I have to catch him- his knees give out._

 

_Y/N all but collapses into me, as soon as he's close, he grabs me and hangs on like I'm going to disappear._

 

_"Hey. Hey. I'm not going anywhere, I'm here."_

 

_I get us both back to the couch. I let Y/N curl up into my lap. I stroke his hair and we just breathe._

 

_Y/N's voice is raw when he speaks._

 

_"My… Mother called."_

 

_That's all I need to hear.  I don't know all of it yet, but I know enough._

 

_Y/N transitioning isn't the only thing that had made life with his mother unlivable._

 

_Alex and Jason had enough proof of abuse, of neglect to win custody when Y/N was sixteen._

 

_His mother walked away then._

 

_He rambles on._

 

_"She always sounds so_ **_earnest_ ** _. Then when I can't give her what she wants, when I don't say yes-_

 

_-She. She turns on me_ **_so quick_ ** _. She knows what I fear, and she uses it. I can't be- I don't think I ever was what she wanted."_

 

_I just want this life. You and Jace and Alex. I- I don't- I don't want-"_

 

_Y/N"s mouth snaps shut- as if what he was about to speak would become real if it left it._

 

_I can feel him trembling._

 

_"You know I’m not going anywhere, right? You don’t have to be afraid.”_

 

_“Why?”_

 

_Y/N looked up at me._

 

_“Because you’ll protect me?”_

 

**_“Damn straight.”_ **

 

++++++

 

You're stretching your legs, when the bells on the door ring as someone comes though the front.

 

Strange. No one's got an appointment…

 

You walk out to the front.

 

Your eyes widen.

 

_Mom._

 

She doesn't see you, so you slip back.

 

Your voice leaves you in a hiss, when you get to your older brother.

 

"Jason _._ Mom's **_here_** _._ "

 

His eyes widen.

 

Alex. Oh, brave, dear Alex. Takes the freaking bullet.

 

He goes out to the front, jaw set and a certain gleam in his eye.

 

_He's about to kill mom with kindness._

 

He's giving us a second to recover.

 

You know she won't get nasty to Alex's face.

 

But you also know she considers Alex a _freak_ , and his identity as much a lie as your own.  

 

_"Girls are girls, boys, boys. You can't change what God made. It is what it is and no different."_

 

Some of her garbage flits through your head.

 

She's so narrow minded.

 

You hear Alex great her and you move forward.

 

Mom wants her children. And you won't leave Alex alone with her.

 

You hear Alex offer the mint tea he made this morning.

 

She won't touch it after she hears 'made it myself'-

 

-opting for the water bottle he offers instead.

 

When your mother's eyes land on you, she lights up.

 

There's such a hungry look on her face.

 

You sit in between Alex and Jace on the couch, and she sits in one of the client chairs.

 

She chattered, about home and extended family.

 

Then we got to the point of her visit.

 

"Why, I saw your video, D/N. I saw your boyfriend. You're finally on the way to normal!"

 

You've been correcting her, but what she's just said freezes you.

 

_What the fuck!?_

 

 

"You haven’t had the surgery, so you can go back, just be a woman again.

 

Besides, wouldn't he be happier with a normal relationship?

 

If your boyfriend is fine with it then you can!"

 

You dimly hear her say something about being late, that she's here for the next week. That she can't wait to meet Mark.

 

There is a roar in your ears that muffles everything.

 

++++++

Mark got out of his car, then stepped over to the back seat and clipped Chica to her leash.

 

"Come on, Bub, Y/N needs us"

 

Jace meets him at the door.

 

Alex was by the couch, looking so unsure, so different from normal, it was scary.

 

Y/N was sitting cross-legged, pulled into himself, small and protected.

 

++++++

 

_Y/N was wrong, he was_ **_rotten_ ** _, and Mother hates him,_ **_it was all his fault-_ **

 

_-No._

 

**_No._ **

 

_Mother_ **_wants_ ** _D/N_

 

_Mother_ **_wants_ ** _her_ **_daughter._ **

 

_Given enough time, would Mark hate him?_

 

_…Would Mark not want him?_

 

++++++

 

You dimly register a warm body climb onto the sofa with you. 

 

You feel sick, undeserving of care.

 

You know there won't be any pain. Mark would _never_.

 

You hunch away from the warmth, arms wrapped around yourself.

 

 

"Can you look at me, Sweetheart?"

 

 

"Y/N, please? My sweet boy, for me?"

 

That makes it worse, you dissolve into tears, and Mark's done waiting.

 

Mark pulls you to him, his front pressed to your back, his arms go around you, a hand rubbing gently against your stomach.

 

After sometime, you turn and immediately bury your face in his chest.

 

He kisses the top of your head.

 

"It's okay, Y/N. I'm here. Nothing's going to happen. I got you."

 

He rocks the both of you until you relax even further against him, falling asleep.

 

 

He looks up at Jace.

 

"What. The. Hell. Happened?!"

 

Alex answers.

 

"That- **_Witch_** \- of a mother showed up.

 

Called him by his dead name a whole bunch, talked like she knew what was going on here, like she knew what was going to happen here.

 

 Like she knew you. Was all bullshit, of course."

 

Mark sighs and pulls you closer.

 

"What are we going to do about this?"

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter title comes from Lady Gaga's You and I.
> 
> I adore that song. I love that music video. Shirtless Taylor Kinney for most of it? 
> 
> Forgive my drool.
> 
> Also, Brian frigging' May on guitar.
> 
> Had to get some fluff in!
> 
> Next chapter: how Y/N's mom effects him even when she's thousands of miles away.


End file.
